Thursday, August 18, 2011

She reads aloud.

North Star,
Star of the sea

I wish for a ship
Named after me

To sail for a day
Alone and free

With someone nice
For company

With her little brother giggling,
she launches the paper boats
across the pond,
fire blooming from their center
until they disappear
around the willow branches.


Growing up, there were many oriental traditional that came to be my own. I always give a new bride a bell to hang in her kitchen (so she can ring it when she's lonely and know that her family hears her, still). I always eat the fortune from my cookie so it will come true. And, I used to always launch wish boats on the Willamette River on the eve of Chinese New Year.

The poem that's quoted here is from The Maggie B by Irene Haas. 

I first read this as a small girl, when reading was my escape from a rough and tumble world. I often long for the simplicity of those times, the long hours spent alone with only my thoughts and Moby Dick or Watership Down for company.

This Flash Fiction, as most of the good ones, leans heavily on my own story. G-Man would love it if you'd play along by writing a story in exactly 55 words. The Noir, the merrier...

Wednesday, August 17, 2011


Stop the bus, I want to get off.

Fear is the wind that snuffs the candle in the mind. I steal that from Enchanted Oak, who also quotes a philosopher or two. Her words hit home this morning, as I water the plants, walk the dog, go through the mental list of all the things I am uniquely responsible for in the world. All 6,532 of them.

Two jobs to not make a person happy. One of them must go. Or I must go. The two of us can no longer live peacefully under the same roof.

I've been blaming strange things for my unhappiness, of late. Well, being afraid has caused me to miss one too many good things in my life, it's time to beat a hasty retreat from that silliness. Who cares where the unhappiness comes from - it must go. NOW.

Yep. Staring fear straight in the face, today, and telling it to go take a flying leap.

You with me? (Now, where's I put those wings?)

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Timeless moments

Have you ever picked a fight?

I know I have, more often than I'd care to admit. Like last night. I'm the queen of fight picking, it seems.

But when a storm is brewing, have you ever stopped to really think about the why? What's underneath your anger and frustration?

For me, it's almost always fear.

I'm angry because I'm afraid, and I don't like to be afraid.

Not "I'm being hunted by a lion and must run or die" afraid, just unsure, uncomfortable, unhappy.

What happens if I accept and embrace fear? Well, we'll find out. Because, at the end of the day, avoiding fear, conflict and conversations gets me exactly nowhere. The same goes for bringing things up when I'm angry. I've got to quit that.

What kind of world would I live in if I could have an open and honest (and difficult) conversation without fear of retribution, without distress - and without raised voices?

Stay tuned...